The victory is mine but the battle is the Lord's;

| 29 September 2010. Day Sixty-Seven of my faith journey with God. |

NYWAYS. Apparently, the moderated, or something of that sort, so my E Math was pushed to an A1, while miraculously, my A Math was pushed to an A2. I mean, I know it's moderated, but really I see there where I am weak, I am truly made strong by He who is in me because at first my A Math had already made a startling improvement from D7 to B3, but now it's gone to A2. You know, if He can make my weak subjects strong, what more can He do for my strong subjects? :)

This pushes my raw score for L1R5 to 12 and L1R4 to 9. WOOHOO. You know, from here on forth, I believe it's just gonna get more and more glorious because of the grace He has imparted to me. I calculated:

English (A1) - Maintain.

Chinese (B3) - Push to A1/2

Biology (B3) - Push to A1

Physics (C6) - Push to A2/1 (Don't get me wrong, I totally don't think I can get an A for Physics, I'm not trying to be in denial. I just don't want to limit God. I would say B3/4 is realistic. But my Daddy God tells me that I'm the head and not the tail.)

Chemistry (B4) - Push to A1 (Again, it's a far cry for Chemistry because I heard that it's really hard to get an A1 for chem, and my chem is not altogether lovely, altogether worthy like Jesus is, but I believe that as He is, so am I in this world.)

Pure Literature (A2) - Push to  A1

Elementary Math (A1) - Maintain.

Additional Math (A2) - Push to A1. (I'm not a naturally math-sy person. I heard it's hard to get an A1 for A Math too. But I'll just trust that Daddy God has placed me above and not beneath.)

Combined Humanities [SS/HY] (B4) - Push to A1. (I'm not sure how easy or hard this one's gonna be because I've no idea whether Cambridge is more open-minded that S'pore markers and accept answers more "liberally". In any case, I'm trusting Holy Spirit to be the wind beneath my wings when I take this leap of faith.

Subjects I intend to score well in anyway.
Subjects I'll use as back-up.
Main 6 subjects.


This has been an amazing journey of faith. When the year started, I kept focusing on the negative, like what if I screw up, etc, I had a worldly mentality. I forgot to take into account that I am a beloved child of the most high God. As I spent more time learning about my loving Daddy God, I know that I am more than a conqueror, I may be hard pressed but I will never be crushed.

The rest of the world can do things the normal way. They can study and mug and revise and consult and get tuition and deprive themselves of fun things, but I know that with grace it's not the same. Being conscious of how Jesus is in my life, sets me apart from the others. Knowing that when we work, God rests, but when we rest, knowing that He is the author and the perfector of our faith, God works and He will bring you to your promised land, no sweat. You may strive and struggle, you will reach there. When you rest, you'll also reach the destination. And in fact, when you leave room for grace and not self-effort, not only will the journey be much more enjoyable, the results will be exceedingly, abundantly, above-all-expectation-ly good. Better than human effort could ever produce! :)

I feel that initially I valued my self-effort. I thought myself to be part of the equation of my success. In the end, I got stressed, afraid, filled with anxiety that my whole future lay in my hands. But you know what? It's nothing to do with me. Because God has so favoured me that He gave me leadership roles in school, because God has so favoured me that I have enjoyed so many benefits, because God has so favoured me, He will work in my O levels and He will produce awesome results because our God is an awesome God. My hands are tiny, when I can't carry something, when I can't take the burden, I cast it on my Daddy God because He cares for me. Because His hands are better than mine. Because He has never completed an imperfect work.

I pray that as I enter into the very, very, very final leg of my secondary school education, remind me that you are always with me and you will never leave me nor forsake me. As I embark on my final preparations, maximise my time spent studying in quality and quantity. Bless the final times as classmates I have left with my friends. Allow me to get to know You more and more. Give me supernatural wisdom, knowledge, favour and understanding. Let your grace turn my weakness into strength, my imperfections to Your perfected work. I will not tire for your strength is in me, I will run and not be weary, I will walk and not faint. Work in me and through me, that as I sit for the exams eventually, it will be Jesus' mind- full of clarity and remembrance- that is attempting the paper. Your work was perfected on the cross without a single careless mistake, so shall mine be. All things are possible with Christ, and I commit all these things and my entire life into Your hands that will always be big enough, :)



Love,
Deborah. [Whom He will never fail nor abandon]

UPDATE:
I just remembered something!! HAHAHAA! The school counsellor actually said that I may be able to jump grades even more at the O levels since at the prelims I haven't even put in full effort yet. Truly, I didn't put in full effort because I felt I didn't wanna overwork myself and need a long time to recuperate before the Os considering I don't have much time left, so I just did some work here and there, focus on the subject especially the day before. So truly, Daddy God has blessed and multiplied my five loaves and two fish. And I'm sure His grace will do the same with my slightly bigger loaves and slightly bigger fish at the O levels. I'm really grateful that He has produced so much fruit out of my small sowing and I know that I, in and of myself, surely isn't this brilliant, but He who is in me gives me the light to shine. :)